Becoming More Self-Aware
December 31, 2024 | By Sree Ravela
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Improving self-awareness is key to personal growth and success. When we have a better understanding of ourselves, we make keener observations and smarter decisions. Over the past few years, I’ve consciously worked on improving my sense of self-awareness, and it has helped me better understand my strengths and potential. I have learned that a strong sense of self-awareness is essential in building strong, sustainable relationships. Here are some helpful approaches to becoming more self-aware that I’ve uncovered throughout my journey.
Let Down Your Guard
We often lack the tools to constructively process criticism. When feedback feels like a personal attack, it triggers a defensive response. In these scenarios, I recommend practicing active listening so you can acknowledging others’ viewpoints to cultivate empathy.
In the words of author Stephen Covey, "When you show deep empathy toward others, their defensive energy goes down, and positive energy replaces it. That’s when you can get more creative in solving problems." Think about how your actions might come across to others. This can broaden your perspective to help you understand the impact you have on the people around you.
Identify Your Blind Spots
We all have blind spots—when we’re unaware of personal shortcomings, feedback provides insights into them. For some people, this can be unsettling and provoke an overreaction because it challenges self-perception. To improve your ability to introspect, try practicing mindfulness everyday to learn how to be present and gather your thoughts without passing judgment.
Practical meditation techniques like Anapanasati encourage reflection from within. I’ve personally benefited from practicing mindfulness meditation. If you’re new to meditation, consider meditating for just five minutes a few times a week. Guided meditations have helped me, and YouTube videos are an excellent and accessible resource for exploring them.
Detach From Egocentrism
People often tie their identity to needing to “be right.” Feedback that contradicts this self-image can threaten the ego, leading to hypersensitivity as a way to shield oneself. But paying attention to your emotional reactions helps you gain control over egocentrism.
Years ago, one of my mentors advised me to walk into discussions that are expected to be intense with a warm cup of tea or coffee in my hand. He suggested this to help me pause before responding to intense emotions. This small moment to reflect during each of those interactions made a world of difference in outcomes.
Regulate Your Emotions
When you can’t healthily regulate your emotions, it makes it harder to process and reflect on feedback, leading to heightened emotional reactions during conversations. Set aside a few minutes each day for self-reflection to practice emotional regulation on a consistent basis.
What were your thoughts and emotions during conversations at home or at work? Consider writing a quick journal entry to get your feelings out. Neuroscientist, Dr. Joe Dispenza, says “Knowledge is power but the knowledge about yourself is self-empowerment, so witness your thoughts about what you’ve achieved—the challenges you’ve faced and the lessons learned from your daily interactions.”
Resist Projection
Lacking self-awareness can lead to projecting insecurities onto others. This is due to interpreting feedback as judgment or criticism rather than an opportunity for improvement. But the key to growth here is actively seeking feedback and taking the time to process it.
While we can’t escape bias, it’s important to ask for regular, honest feedback from someone you trust, whether that’s a family member, friend, acquaintance, coworker, etc. Ask them how they observed your behaviors in certain situations and what alternate behaviors they would recommend for better outcomes. This can help reveal perspectives about yourself that you may be overlooking, so be vulnerable.
Upon identifying areas of improvement, make note and slowly work through each piece of feedback. Be open and receptive instead of defensive. If your guard is up, you’ll lose key insights to gaining a better understanding of yourself.
Overcome Fearfulness
Most feedback tends to highlight a need for change or action, which can feel overwhelming. Increased hypersensitivity transforms into deflecting responsibility. Manage these feelings by setting personal goals and actively tracking them. Identify specific areas you want to work on, whether in mindset or behavior. Then, check in with these goals at a designated time each week, then month, then year, celebrating your wins along the way. Setting both long and short term goals makes this seemingly overwhelming journey not only manageable but also rewarding.
Thoughtfulness and consistency foster growth over time. This journey of self-awareness has been transformative for me. It's not a destination, but a continuous process of excavation and growth. By incorporating these practices into my life, I've learned to navigate challenges with greater emotional intelligence and build stronger connections with others.
Now it's your turn. Take a step towards self-discovery, and remember, even small changes can lead to significant transformations. I invite you to share your own experiences and outcomes from journeying through self-awareness.